This is my longest blog post. Also, it has no point.
It’s Monday night as I write. You’ll be reading this sometime on Tuesday but I don’t feel like pretending it’s Tuesday morning. Ya know? I feel like it just won’t flow the same. So it’s Monday night. 10:08pm and here I am.
I woke up this morning, with high hopes for the day. It was going to be a fresh start. I’ve been struggling to be in the word, I haven’t been swimming in like a month, and I just haven’t been doing the best job managing the house. So today was the day…a fresh start, with lots of resolutions and new ideas.
Read the bible, drink eight glasses of water, no chocolate, make homemade apple sauce with flax seed in it, try my hand at homemade yogurt, schooling with the kids, play with the kids, go swimming. Yeah, flax seed and homemade yogurt. Shoulda suspected something was terribly wrong right there.
Well my body forgot to join my good intentions for the day, especially my head. It just felt like it was in a cloud all day. I felt like I couldn’t really focus on anything and all that I wanted to do was crawl back in bed and close my eyes for like five hours. Not the plan, nor an option, so I pressed on, hoping to get some energy as I checked items off my list.
So I burnt the apple sauce. Apple sauce. Burnt it. Maddie cried when I tried to feed it to her. Eight apples in the garbage. Scratch that plan about having homemade apple sauce in the fridge for the week.
The blog I read about making yogurt sounded so easy. It lied. Scratch that plan about having homemade yogurt in the fridge for the week.
Why am I making these things? Don’t they sell these things at the grocery store? Already prepared? Right.
Well, so I wasted some apples and some milk and my time but at least I could get my exercise in for the day. Off I headed to the pool, in my new borrowed swimsuit. My other one fell apart, and I just haven’t had time to go bathing suit shopping. Plus I hate swimsuit shopping. .
Well, I got to the pool and it was pretty packed but I managed to find a lane to swim in. I took off from the edge, all excited and ready to be reunited with my love of swimming…. and it was at this moment that I realized that my bathing suit top was a little large on me. It’s a two piece tankini, with a skirt. My anticipation of feeling refreshed and invigorated quickly dissipated and was replaced by sudden panic and embarrassment. My mind began to desperately seek a non-awkward solution to this problem.
I could tie the straps up with my hair tie and tighten them? Weird. Plus then I wouldn’t have anything in my hair to keep it back, and for some reason I chose not to wear my swim cap tonight. Flowing hair, a bathing suit with a skirt and a tankini top tied back with a hair elastic just didn’t seem like the appropriate look for some sporty swimming. I changed to the backstroke on my way back to the edge of the pool. I don’t even know how to do the backstroke properly. Then I mustered up all my dignity and left the pool, after one clumsy lap. Good thing I asked that lady to squeeze over so I could swim beside her.
On my way home from the pool, I convinced myself that I should go into Loblaws and buy some of the things that I’d wanted to pick up earlier that day and didn’t get to. You know, because I was too busy burning apple sauce and wasting milk. I thought I could redeem some of the day, if I just got the steel cut oats I wanted. Then I could at least make some crock pot oatmeal and serve my children a wonderful nutritious breakfast in the morning. I convinced myself that it didn’t matter that my hair was soaking wet and I was wearing sweat pants with crocs and socks and my glasses were missing half of one arm so they were sitting slanted on my face. It didn’t matter. Steel cut oats matter. I parked the car and reached for my wallet.
Oh right. I left it at home, because I locked the key in my locker the other day at the pool when I took the kids for swimming lessons and they had to cut my lock in half. No lock, no wallet at the pool. No steel cut oats.
Well on the bright side, I had something to write for this blog post. Take two tomorrow!
thispassinglife.com 
Stace! If yesterday was good for anything, it was good for a huge laugh from me today 🙂 I feel like I have those days regularly… Like the most recent time I tried making homemade tortillas with cornflour. Tasted like drywall… Yikes.
Girl, it sounds like your Monday was like my Monday…here’s to a better Tuesday for you. xx
I agree – this post made me laugh so much. I could just picture you doing this and I know exactly how you were feeling after each attempt at the task-list redemption. I hope your day is much better today.
This quote is perfect for your Monday. 🙂 Hope today was better!
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”
– Agata.